...I now started praying and asking God more seriously to open this door for me to travel as I could not seem to keep it away despite how hard I tried. I started applying the word I was hearing. I realized that thanksgiving and praise were things I needed to work on. When God provided a car for me last year, one instruction He gave me was give thanks for all things…this was before I saw the car. So I figured that God probably has this worked out already but I needed to connect with it all through praise and thanksgiving. This was heavily impressed on my heart that one day I decided to share with the International Christian Fellowship at Uconn about what God was doing and thanking God ahead of time for making a way for me even though I do not know how He was going to do it. So on a Friday in July I stood up and shared with them about a big issue I was believing God for (could not tell them the details) and wanted to thank God ahead of time for it. The following week just before fellowship started one of the ladies at the fellowship she was in the congregation the week before when I shared about my expectation. She pulled out an envelop from her bag and pointed it to me saying” here have this the Lord says I should give it to you, it is for your ticket home, I know it may not be enough but at least it will help, take” I was speechless. Words ceased. I tried to explain to her that actually it was not a money issue but something bigger, she was already walking away. She did not really want to know all she wanted was to deliver the money to me. I walked to my car still speechless. After fellowship I got into my room opened the envelop and counted the money - $2,000! I let out my first long laughter, a practice that I will repeat many more times in this journey. I was not laughing at God but out of excitement and bewilderment. I smiled and I shook my head I was like wow God so how? I mean how? Money for ticket but no visa how come? I got no response...
***************************************************Just in case you were curious how the story ended~she's going to travel home :) --jeannette
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... I was now even more determined to trust God and see Him answer this prayer. I told Him several times Lord I trust you and if nobody stands with me, I trust you regardless on this issue. “I will trust you even when everyone says there is no need to. I will trust you in a case that seems hopeless; because that is when it is most logical to trust you. This is when it makes sense to trust you.
My prayer and talk changed. I started asking many more questions why would God bring me this far just for fun? Why would He not answer this request? Yes I have said that I have nothing to loose if the Lord did not open this door but I realized I had something to loose. I informed God that I will loose an experience with Him, I will loose another opportunity to see Him display His power magnificently in my life. I began to rehearse the many miracles He has brought me through many of them happened at the 11th hr:
- My admission into secondary school at the last minute the year I had lost hope of going to sec school
- His deliverance and intervention at the last minute when I needed to get my results for my youth service
- The miracles he wrought regarding my trip to the US
- My last minute admission in CCSU
- My free Honda accord
- etc
...
Today, I woke with this song on my lips. God will make a way where there seems to be no way. He works in ways we cannot see, He will make a way for me. He will be my guide walk me closely to His side with love and faith for each new day He will make a way. He will make a way...
So how come all the words the Lord has spoken to me starting from last year, I have kept aside and have been waiting to hear from a mere man? How come the words the Lord has spoken are not enough? If I wanted to use the words from the embassy as confirmation of God leading that would have been a different thing altogether. No I was banking on their word. Infact in error in my email to Osweileir I wrote, my coming depends on what you say, if you say I should come I will”. Thank God he did not reply. God cannot answer prayers that are contrary to His work. I wanted an assurance from man God made sure I did not get it. All I have to lean on now is what He has said. Faith indeed remains a substance of things hoped for…the evidence of things not seen!
I feel I am standing between the red sea and something else huge may be Pharaoh and his men? and that the decision I make now either way will have an impact on my life as long as live. Should I take the high mountain and advance to the red sea and watch God perform a miracle I have never experienced before or should I back off and return? It appears I am in a tight place. Turning from the red sea and returning appears to be the easy way out, the “safe thing to do” but how will I live with all those clear words of assurance I have received through prophecy? What story will I tell for the rest of my life? That God spoke all these words and assurances, pretty much gave me a check and I never cashed it? Too many things have happened, too many words spoken that I refuse to believe it is all coincidence. Faith after all remains a choice!
